~Like a rainbow after the rain that God's faithful promise ~
It's rain outside, the cold embraced me tonight, hear the thunders over my house, and see lightning through my window flashy the yard outside. I feel the same thing inside me that there is a battle between my spirit and my flesh.
"You can Eva"
"No, you can't"
"You just need the time and hope"
"No, you did and you lost the hope. Remember many times what you expected didn't go as your will?"
There's a crying inside me Oh God help me, I am not able to do this and that, I never even before and always. That's why I won't stop praying but sometimes it's tiring thing for me to do so I won't praying in my bad mood...I feel nothing after pray. I wish, I have power and rich...I can do whatever I want, I can order people to stop hurting my family. They have anything, they can do whatever they want and me? praying and praying, and praying without see something happens.
"Who says nothing happens? It's just need a time for Me to fix. Trust Me. That's all I want"
I want now, that's what You always say my Lord. I'm sick of these things, it's just again and again
"Open your eyes for what I have done for you and your family in past. I never left you nor forsake you"
Yes my Lord, I just need You to set my mind to always understand Your ways
"You don't need to understand My ways My dear...you need to trust Me. There's a beautiful rainbow after the rain. That's my promise, and that's how I work"
This is how we live in this world that we always need God. Seek His face and trusting Him all the times, even when we're in the deep valley. This is the battle inside me everyday when the circumstances hit me more and more trying to put my faith down but He is faithful God. I'm worried to much that things are going to changes in the future. Always, everyday when I'm alone and every night when I'm laying on my bed. Worries never stop haunting me
What happen if..., how about..., what if...,
Life is hard, I wish I could always smile all the times but smile and happy would not change everything. I need "trust" it changes everything for good no matter how hard life is.
It's God's promises that there's always a rainbow after the rain. There's always joy after weeping, There's always a harvest after sow, and there's hope after struggle.
My prayer for you who dealing with this everyday. The battle never end as long as we are here but God is faithful.
For his anger lasts only a moment,but his favor lasts a lifetime;weeping may stay for the night,but rejoicing comes in the morning.(Psalm 30:5)